The Plastic Grass Gardening Society


This is real grass…

Neighbours whose garden backs on to ours are having some hefty work done. Workmen arrived a couple of days ago, dismantling the decking, bashing all hell out of the concrete underneath, roughly rotovating the lawn (most of the garden is lawn) and clearing everything. Today – horror of horrors – a large white sheet covering the rotovated area has been put in place and we know what that probably means.

Plastic grass.

Someone we know recently killed off all signs of wildlife in their garden by laying plastic grass and installing a stone patio. A tree had to come down to allow this to happen, but there was a promise of pots and tubs to bring a bit of life to the area.

I dislike plastic grass intensely and nurture a secret desire to discover, in a guerilla kind of way, if it melts or burns….

What lives below ground, such as earthworms, bugs and larvae, don’t stand a chance once that Plastic Doom has been laid. The earth can’t live, breathe, provide drainage for heavy rain and it can’t nurture plants – nothing can grow, there’s no chance for lettuce, radish, rhubarb – stuff we can actually eat, grow and provide for ourselves rather than relying on supermarket shopping.

For some time to come, that garden will be  pretty dead area. No flowers of any kind will grow – clover, daisies, homes for nature, caterpillars, insects, birds, butterflies, bees….I could go on but maybe this rant will have to suffice for now. Nature is resilient, it will come back eventually, breaking through the plastic layers to find the sun and the light and the rain. Nature will always win.

In the meantime, I know for sure that this plastic imposter is surrounded by real gardens which DO offer homes for nature, and can only hope that any wildlife which may have wandered or flown into the neighbour’s garden will come our way instead and enrich our wild-life friendly patch.


A home for bees, butterflies, hoverflies, frogs, newts, fish, damselflies….and more

2 thoughts on “The Plastic Grass Gardening Society

  1. Like is not the word I want to use, obviously, but I like your attitude. I rank plastic grass (what’s next, plastic pots with fake flowers?) right up there with what they do here, which is pave over as much of the landscape as they can for a new mall, grocery store, or movie complex.
    You’re right, the earth wins, eventually, and maybe not in my lifetime, maybe in yours, the pretend grass will start to break down.
    My husband’s cousin did that to his wooded lawn/front yard, and I refuse to even acknowledge it as even existing.

    It’s also nice that you and your neighbors reap the animals and birds that are no longer welcome in the Other Place. (Actylene Torch. Think Flame Thrower)

    Liked by 1 person

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